The worst kind of diseased mind ... is one filled with jealousy

Ok ... so I'm reading the new Johann S Lee novel ... its only his second since his still wonderfully resonating debut, "Peculiar Chris". (Now if you are a 30+ middle class gay male singaporean, then you need to read this book ... its your story give or take a few embellishments).

The new one is about a character called Ben Goh, who is what we would refer to as a banana ... i.e. yellow on the outside, but white on the inside ... oh its stating the obvious isn't it ... anyhoo, you get my drift. He comes from a well to do family (which I suspect is exactly the sort of childhood Johann himself had to endure!), has a great job in London, parties hard with glamourous friends, then returns to Singers after 15 years away for a holiday and a re-discovering of self ... only he doesn't really have to do it on a budget, and being the only son of a wealthy family, can navigate the philosophical (psychological?) dips and dives in the secure knowledge that one day, he would indeed inherit the earth .. or at least a very expensive part of the whole!!

(again I suspect that this is something Johann himself will have to steel his nerves for ... well ... eventually)

I guess what I'm trying to say is Bitch has my life!! OHMYGOD!! Ok well not exactly my life .. but at least the movie that's playing in my head ... the one I really want!

jealous ... much?? Yeah godammitt!. I've always wanted to be posh. (bitch is good looking too!).

Anyways, I got this for Christmas and I'm already halfway through the book ... I can't help it ... I identify with him in more ways than I care to admit ... including the way I cross my chopsticks ... and how I have always been of the opinion that boys from RI eventually become the ruling class ... and that boys from ACS come from the upper echelons of Singapore wealth ... and how I disdain of singapore's tourist attractions ... but end up enjoying my time spent there when I am dragged kicking and screaming ...

Jealous and homesick .. thats what I am today ... and Melbourne ... shit-a-brick .. its summer ... hello??? WHy am I still in winter boots and double layers?? C'mon sun ... you can do it!!

Oh.